Off topic: Poorly Written and Misspelled Classified Ads 论题张贴者: Andrei Albu
| Andrei Albu 罗马尼亚 Local time: 15:13 正式会员 (自2002) English英语译成Romanian罗马尼亚语 + ...
I am sure most, if not all of you, must have encountered such funnies. Maybe not these..., collected by Maurizio Mariotti. Enjoy and think of the challenge of translating them into various other languages, just for the sake of fun ------------------------------------------- 2 female Boston Terrier puppies, 7 wks old, Perfect markings, 555-1234. Leave mess. Lost: small apricot poodle. Rewa... See more I am sure most, if not all of you, must have encountered such funnies. Maybe not these..., collected by Maurizio Mariotti. Enjoy and think of the challenge of translating them into various other languages, just for the sake of fun ------------------------------------------- 2 female Boston Terrier puppies, 7 wks old, Perfect markings, 555-1234. Leave mess. Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family. A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms. Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00. Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too. Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory. Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night. We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand. For Sale -- Eight puppies from a German Shepperd and an Alaskan Hussy. Great Dames for sale. Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it. Vacation Special: have your home exterminated. Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in. Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours. Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast. Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots of women wear nothing else. Stock up and save. Limit: one. For Rent: 6-room hated apartment. Wanted: chambermaid in rectory. Love in, $200 a month. References required. Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to fly. Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first! Christmans tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person. Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential. Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink. 3-year-old teacher need for pre-school. Experience preferred. Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included. Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again. Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary. Wanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family. We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00. ▲ Collapse | | |
Thanks Andrei for the good laugh. I had a very good time reading them. Marianela | | | Javier Herrera (X) Spanish西班牙语 Flat for rent | Jun 17, 2004 |
Sorry no DHS/pets. | | | Henry Hinds 美国 Local time: 06:13 English英语译成Spanish西班牙语 + ... 纪念
I don't know if you have ever heard of him in Romania, but we have a man here by the name of Jay Leno who would pay you good money for this stuff! | |
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Jack Doughty 英国 Local time: 13:13 Russian俄语译成English英语 + ... 纪念 Saw one myself the other day | Jun 18, 2004 |
Headline in the "Daily Telegraph" GOVERNMENT EGGS ON SPAM BAN After briefly wondering why the Government should care if I fancied a fried egg on top of a slice of Spam, I read the article and found that the Government is speeding up plans for a ban on unwanted emails. | | | Sol 美国 Local time: 08:13 Spanish西班牙语译成English英语 + ... Oh, man, you made me cry! | Jun 19, 2004 |
My kids came running when they heard me laughing out loud! These are hilarious! Thanks!!! | | | LCK 美国 Local time: 08:13 English英语译成Spanish西班牙语 + ... really funny :-) | Jun 20, 2004 |
I like the one with the menu special haha! | | | Shahab Arif Local time: 17:13 Pushto普什图语译成English英语 + ...
Really enjoyed.Thanks for making us laugh:)) | |
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Paul Dixon 巴西 Local time: 09:13 Portuguese葡萄牙语译成English英语 + ... New Joke - Hotel Notice | Jun 22, 2004 |
I would like to add one more bit of humour (this one actually a sign in a hotel lobby): The waitress will give you a bill and you may sign her on the backside. | | | Andrei Albu 罗马尼亚 Local time: 15:13 正式会员 (自2002) English英语译成Romanian罗马尼亚语 + ... 主题发起人 Thank you, Paul, | Jun 22, 2004 |
for contributing. This gave me an idea. What would you all say if we developed this into a real collection of (funny) poorly written and misspelled classified ads? Would anyone know of an outlet willing to publish such a collection? Have a good day (or night) everybody. Andrei | | | pcovs 丹麦 Local time: 14:13 English英语译成Danish丹麦语 Indeed funny; here are some more! | Jun 27, 2004 |
FUNNY ENGLISH NOTICES AROUND THE WORLD! --------------------------------------- Here are some signs and notices written in English that were discovered throughout the world. You have to give the writers an 'E' for Effort. We hope you enjoy them. In a Tokyo Hotel: Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a person to do such thing is please not to read notis. In a B... See more FUNNY ENGLISH NOTICES AROUND THE WORLD! --------------------------------------- Here are some signs and notices written in English that were discovered throughout the world. You have to give the writers an 'E' for Effort. We hope you enjoy them. In a Tokyo Hotel: Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a person to do such thing is please not to read notis. In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable. In a Leipzig elevator: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up. In a Belgrade hotel elevator: To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order. In a Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk. In a hotel in Athens: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily. In a Yugoslavian hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid. In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid. In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday. In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension. On the menu of a Swiss restaurant: Our wines leave you nothing to hope for. On the menu of a Polish hotel: Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion. Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs. In a Bangkok dry cleaner's: Drop your trousers here for best results. Outside a Paris dress shop: Dresses for street walking. In a Rhodes tailor shop: Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation. A sign posted in Germany's Black forest: It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose. In a Zurich hotel: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose. In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist: Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists. In a Rome laundry: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time. In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency: Take one of our horse-driven city tours - we guarantee no miscarriages. Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: Would you like to ride on your own ass? In a Swiss mountain inn: Special today -- no ice cream. In a Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man. In a Tokyo bar: Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts. In a Copenhagen airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions. On the door of a Moscow hotel room: If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it. In a Norwegian cocktail lounge: Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar. In a Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty. In the office of a Roman doctor: Specialist in women and other diseases. In an Acapulco hotel: The manager has personally passed all the water served here. In a Tokyo shop: Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run. From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself. From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor. Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance: - English well talking. - Here speeching American. ▲ Collapse | | | Margarita Palatnik (X) Local time: 09:13 Spanish西班牙语译成English英语 + ... Get rid of aunts | Jul 12, 2004 |
[quote]Andrei Albu wrote: Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours. How long for the mother-in-law? | |
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Margarita Palatnik (X) Local time: 09:13 Spanish西班牙语译成English英语 + ... another sign | Jul 12, 2004 |
A sign-board on the street in a Turkish tourist spot: Enemies of the mosquitos on sale here | | | To report site rules violations or get help, contact a site moderator: You can also contact site staff by submitting a support request » Poorly Written and Misspelled Classified Ads Wordfast Pro | Translation Memory Software for Any Platform
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